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The Money The reason girls love status is the same one women do: In study after study, it’s associated with a man’s ability to provide and protect. Across a series of studies, the “jerk perk” is worth about k a year on average, or 18% more than more agreeable male peers.
And jocks are not always known for throwing their weight around in the kindest possible ways.
They take the brave risks of saying that they’re in love, and backing it up with their behavior.
I can’t overstate this: In studies, the most attractive thing you can do is to openly admire the person you’re with. In reviewing 40 years of solid science on long-term love, here’s what I know for sure: If you can find and be someone kind and respectful, your relationship will work well, and if you can’t it won’t.
Basically, they have a little more money, and that’s it. Nice guys are good breadwinners, and in many decades of science, it’s clear that once you have enough money for the basics, you won’t be substantially happier with more.
Jerks are less well-liked, they have more stress, and they have less happy lives.
But they don’t get or stay married more easily; they aren’t loved more, or longer.
Factually, their lives and loves are crappier—not happier.
You see, I never saw being nice as a decision that needed to be made – I understood it as a state that naturally existed. Understanding why women go for those bad boys isn’t difficult to understand.
I didn’t feel that I should go out of my way to be nice because I liked being nice. There are some women who want the nice guy because they understand that nice means good and not nice means bad. They aren’t very open, keeping mostly to themselves – that’s mysterious.
So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating.